MDS: Traveling Again

MDS MAN TRAVELS TO CAPE COD
Wife accompanied him on vacation trip.

Mashpee, Mass., June 23 (Kaplan News Network)—Reliable sources on Cape Cod yesterday indicated that MDSMitch's first post-MDS-diagnosis foray into the world of travel is going well.

The weather is not.

Amidst winds gusting to 40-MPH and rains of intermittently torrential proportions, the patient was seen arriving by car, accompanied by his wife Penelope. "They pulled up next to us when we were waiting at a stop light," said one area resident who asked not to be identified so as to avoid being overwhelmed by over-zealous reporters and paparazzi. "He was driving. She was in the front passenger seat, drinking an iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts. They both looked fine."

The area resident further reported that the patient "showed no sign of wear and tear from making the five-hour drive."

The actual drive time was recorded at five hours and eight minutes.

The patient's New Jersey neighbors noted that Kaplan and Kaplan had gotten a reasonably early start, departing Fair Lawn at 9:30 a.m. after loading two small suitcases, a back pack, a three-bottle wine tote, a soft brief case and a bag of books-on-disk into the car. A golf bag and golf course pull cart were stowed in a Thule automobile rooftop cargo box.

"Leaving at that hour was a smart move," a noted traffic analyst noted. "It allowed them to avoid rush hour back-ups on the Tappan Zee Bridge, and gave them pretty clear sailing along I-95."

Two brief breaks at roadside rest stops were carried out without incident. No injuries, medical emergencies, immune-deficient episodes, marital discordances or indigestion from a picnic lunch were reported.

Mashpee, Mass., area medical facilities are said to be on alert for any MDS-related exigency. "We're prepared to help," said one man thought to be a health care worker as he exited a McDonald's adjacent to a doctor's office of some kind. Asked what sort of medical exigency might be encountered in such a situation, he replied, "Oh you know, unexplained bruising or brooding; or, nap-deprivation syndrome."

Meanwhile, the weathermen, assisted by pretty young female TV weather readers, were distressed to describe the ongoing meteorological situation on the Cape.

"Rain, rain and more rain," said a television meteorologist who could not be identified due to the pronounced precipitation. "And lots and lots of wind," added his attractive, young female colleague as her long blond locks shot straight out behind her during an intense and wild gust.

"The weather sucks, and MDS-M isn't too happy that his projected golfing is being jeopardized," said a Kaplan spokesperson, who asked to remain unnamed because he doesn't actually know the patient, "but he's happy just to be out of the damned house and traveling again."